Don’t Let the Mob Win Out

I woke up this morning staring at the Washington Post headline, “Trump Mob Storms Capitol” feeling a range of emotions from – we saw this coming to the desire to hold Trump and his enablers accountable for this insurrection. Yesterday was the first time since the war of 1812 that our Capitol – the beacon of democracy – was invaded, occupied and vandalized. It was also the first time for the Confederate flag to be strutted through its sacred halls. There is also the sadness that our own credibility on the world stage is further eroded as other countries issue statements in support of our institutions similar to ones our United States Embassies have issued when their democracies have been threatened. 

As many of you, I am mad and over the last 24 hours have used my social media platform to vent. While it feels good in the moment, I’m also concerned how this further alienates me from friends and family who voted for Trump and now they will shut down further from anything any of us have to say about holding him accountable for this attack on our democracy. And I know some of you are not ready to talk about reconciliation and giving a pass to those who have supported Trump. I’m not sure I am either. In fact I’ve seen many Facebook posts telling their friend group to unfriend them if they still support Trump. 

Then as I continued the doom scrolling on Twitter this morning, an old friend reached out. We’ve been in touch over the last year to check in on the election and his views generally. This person is an independent, hardworking business person and someone who is even keeled. He has voted for both Republicans and Democrats. What he said to me resonated and made me reevaluate how we need to approach this. His comment was this, “Use your social media platform to show compassion for those who supported Trump. Many of us including myself feel a sense of let down and shame. Help us who support the Republican platform by showing that we are all one team, one nation.”  This gave me pause as it’s not much different from what my wife who works in peacebuilding always says to me which is we need to build a unifying narrative. And it also crystallized for me that we need to provide an exit ramp without shame and abuse for those immediately around us – friends and family – who want to get off the Trump train. This doesn’t mean turning them all into Democrats or even that they’ll support our policies. It’s about giving a space to those who have also realized that the demagogic and populist rhetoric has gone too far. It’s also an understanding that there is a lot of pain out there on all sides. Systemic racism is a legacy we are facing ever more acutely and African-Americans and Latinos feel the brunt of it daily. We are in middle of a horrifying pandemic, people have lost loved ones and jobs, and social inequality worsens daily for working class Americans. Things aren’t easy for anyone. We need to remember that.

President-elect Biden and many of the senators from both parties gave important speeches yesterday which began to tie together an important narrative about who we are as a country. First by calling out what happened yesterday in the strongest language and providing a roadmap around coming together as Americans with a sense of common purpose to reclaim our country. This won’t be easy given the media echo chambers we live in and the radicalization of many individuals through conspiracies and disinformation. It also won’t be easy to give a pass to enablers around Trump who with two weeks left in the administration are now having an epiphany around how bad the past four years have been. Though we have to start somewhere and that begins with those closest to us, whether it’s a family member, friend or someone on Facebook you haven’t seen since high school or college. Don’t shut yourself off from others at this important moment. We are seeing this phenomenon of monetizing hate and division in every country on earth. Resist the temptation to apply a broad-brush stroke to everyone who voted for Trump. In any polarized society there are those who are the loudest on the extreme fringes, but there are more in the middle that may at times become enamored with populism but can come back when the anti-democratic nature of it is exposed. 

This doesn’t mean we have to be Pollyannaish about where we are today as a country and what it will take to set us on the right course. What we can’t do is give up or become further entrenched in polarizing positions that the extremes win out. It’s going to be a really bumpy ride for a long time to come. More individuals will come forward peddling hate and division. This will not end. Those of us across party lines who stand for unity, compassion, hope, rule of law, and democracy need to stand our ground. The time is now friends. Reach out and talk to those who see things differently. Don’t let the mob win out.